East London-based rape survivor Zizo Apleni, who was first raped by her father at the age of seven and became pregnant when she was 13 as a result, was grateful that her mother had believed her.
Apleni was speaking to Komani residents and pupils who were united in solidarity at a boys and girls, mens and womens, indaba and prayer meeting against Gender-Based Violence (GBV).
The initiative was conducted by the Chris Hani District Municipality (CHDM) in partnership with Izwi Lamakhosikazi, at the Indoor Sports Centre on Wednesday.
Apleni said her mother’s support had given her the ability to fight through her battle of dealing with the impact of the abuse.
She urged parents to believe their children if they told them they had been abused, as failing to do so resulted in more emotional damage.
“After I disclosed that my father was my rapist more children confessed that my father, a teacher, had also raped them at school.
“I am a rape survivor because others are killed by the perpetrators or end up committing suicide.
“I want other people who are going through trauma to heal in time.”
She said she sought to inspire others through her story and a part of her healing process included taking a decision to forgive her father.
Apleni has since written a book about her experience, which she plans to publish soon.
ANC Women’s League national executive committee member and deputy minister of human settlements & water and sanitation, Pamela Tshwete, said the fight against GBV must not only be left to President Cyril Ramaphosa but was the responsibility of all citizens.
“We see how bad the nation has become, especially after the passing of Uyinene Mrwetyana, which provoked a lot of women to take a stand.
“She did not die at a party or a tavern, her murder happened when she went to fetch a parcel at the post office, only to find that some man had planned to rape and kill her.
“He went as far as burning Mrwetyana and her family had to bury her bones.”
She acknowledged that Mrwetyana was not the first victim of GBV, but there were many women who had suffered violence across the country.
The deputy minister said she was grateful that Chris Hani District Municipality mayor, Wongama Gela, was taking a stand, and action in the community by empowering people on how to fight GBV.
“We are grateful to the mayor that pupils formed part of this initiative.
“The president told us in his recent visit to Lusikisiki about a grade seven pupil being raped by a teacher.
“Teachers should fill the role of a parents in school. This requires us to have such platforms to bring awareness to residents and pupils.”
CHDM mayor Wongama Gela said males also suffered abuse.
Gela said: “There was a case in Ngcobo where three boys were raped by teachers in school.”
Pupils were offered a platform to debate about GBV.
“The platform was offered for them to express themselves on how they viewed GBV and to come up with their own solutions on how the problem can be curbed in society.
“The intention is not only to expose GBV, but to provide a platform for men to say ‘Not in our name’ because not all men are involved,” he said.
“I encourage men to blow the whistle to stop GBV.”
The event ended with the deputy minister, in partnership with Gift of the Givers, handing over water, blankets and nappies to community members.